Thursday, September 2, 2010


Don't mess with Machine Gun McCain.  Why?  Because he has a machine gun.  Duh!  They even named the movie after him.  He loves machine guns so much they put the words "Machine Gun" in his freakin name.  That means this movie is going to be hardcore.  I mean freakin hardcore.  You know this guy is going to mess with the mob and when the mob messes back he is going to shoot them in the face with his machine gun.  Look at that poster.  MG McCain is larger than life and all those people he kills are just small toys to him.   Wow! What a badass!  Machine Gun McCain shoots a lot of bad guys with his machine gun in this movie that just so happens to be named after him.  And by 'a lot' I mean two.  TWO?...........WTF!

That's right, folks, Machine Gun McCain is an old 60's Italian heist flick with a lot of setup but almost no pay off.  If you look at that poster there are two guys dead on the ground with two more standing up as if they are being shot.  Guess what.  The two on the ground are the same as the two standing up and neither one of them is shot by the larger than life Machine Gun McCain.  They are gunned down by the mob.  Does MG McCain shoot anybody?  Yeah, he shoots two low level goons near the beginning of the movie.  That's it.  I think there are maybe three scenes where Machine Gun McCain actually carries a machine gun.  Yet despite the fact that the movie doesn't live up to the carnage and excitement the title promises I like this movie.

The premise of this movie is very simple but told in a complicated way.  Essentially all that really happens is that Machine Gun McCain is released from prison.  He robs a casino that is run by the mob.  The mob kills Machine Gun McCain and his wife trying to leave the country.  It's the disappointing yet matter-of-fact ending that makes me like this movie.  Yes, I did see it coming half way through the movie but I still liked it.  This movie answers the question "Why can't villains in movies be really smart?"  The answer is "The bad guys would win and then you wouldn't like watching movies anymore".  At the end MG McCain is on a boat about to leave.  The bad guys show up with his wife.  As she runs to him they shoot her in the back.  McCain is pissed and charges out after them but he can't find them.  They are all hidden.  He runs out into the open to his dead wife and BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!  McCain is dead.  Movie over.  You got to love a movie that doesn't insult the audience and tell it like it is.  Lesson learned.  Don't mess with the mob.  Isn't that what would happen in real life?

I guess there is part of me that wanted the movie to insult me with a big shoot 'em up ending where McCain kills all the baddies before either getting away with the money or taken down by enough bullets to bring down Godzilla.  I mean that is why I bought the movie in the first place.  I watched the trailer on youtube before I bought it and I did notice that there wasn't much in terms of action being shown.  But I don't regret it.  I enjoyed the whole movie.  I have really grown to love Italian cinema because you never know how the movie will end.  It doesn't matter how big your star is or how mainstream the movie is if the script calls for the hero's death they die.  Happy endings are not as common as they are here in the states.  YIKES!  I think if Lee Marvin was Machine Gun McCain the movie would have a totally different ending.  Nobody messes with Lee Marvin.  Well, unless your name is John Wayne.


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